Do you know how to identify the signs of a cheating boyfriend?
The most important thing is watching for changes in behavior; a cheating boyfriend’s behavior can change significantly when he starts cheating.
Listen to your intuition and trust what your gut says.
The best sign will be your own intuition. Each boyfriend and relationship is different.
You know your relationship better than anyone else, so trust your instincts first.
If you are having trouble determining if he is cheating, there are some behaviors to monitor.
Spends Less Time With You
This is only a sign if you have been together long enough to notice a distinct change in time spent with each other.
For example, early in a relationship, it can be quite common to be together a lot, often at the expense of friends, school, hobbies, or work.
As a relationship settles in more, one or both of you will likely return to a more per-relationship schedule.
A better clue is when he seems more distant than usual, even if the time you spend together hasn’t changed too much.
Some more specific clues may be:
- Says he is really busy at work. This may very well be true. To verify if he is working, look for signs of him being more tired than usual when he comes home, after all, he has worked more hours than normal. Another sign is having more money.
- More time with “friends.” Again, this could be true. He may be missing time with his buddies and wants to hang out with them. Perhaps a new video game has come out or the sport’s playoffs are on TV and he is doing that with his friends. If he was really out with friends, he should be able to describe what he was doing. If he uses vague descriptions and fails to mention whom he was with, there is a chance he is cheating. This is true for both traditional and long-distance relationships.
Cheating Boyfriend Behavioral Changes
Marked changes in his behavior are also signs of a cheating boyfriend.
Here are some possibilities to watch for.
- Picks fights. All couples fight, and just because you have a fight, it doesn’t mean he is cheating or wants to break up. He could also be extra stressed at the moment. You may also just be going through a difficult period in your relationship. Although if it seems like he is picking fights for no good reason at all, it is time to watch out. This is especially true if he immediately leaves after the fight. He might be trying to cool off – or he is leaving to be with his other girlfriend.
- New phone habits. A good way to tell if he might be cheating is by observing his phone habits. If he is cheating, he is likely talking to the other woman on his phone quite often or she is calling him. Find out if his line is busy more often, or if he is receiving more phone calls than normal. Another behavior to watch for is turning off his phone or not answering calls when he is with you. You should also pay attention if he suddenly puts password protection on his phone though he never had one before.
- Sudden change in interests. When we are exposed to new people, often we will develop some of their tastes. With a new girlfriend, he may start displaying new behavior that he learned from her. For example, has his interest in music changed suddenly? What about a desire to watch TV shows or see movies that he never wanted to see before? By itself, this is no sign of cheating boyfriend, but when observed along with other changes, it is a strong indication that he may be cheating.
- Accuses you of cheating. Ironically, a cheating boyfriend may, in fact, accuse you of cheating. He may be feeling guilty and tries to pawn off his guilt onto you. It could also be that he is trying to hide behind his own accusations.
Sometimes women will look back on events and wonder how they didn’t realize cheating was present, but the truth is that sometimes the signs are just so obvious you disregard them when they happen.
- Calls you another name. Whether just in passing or while having a romantic moment, him calling you another woman’s name points to his mind being on her and not you.
- Becomes ultra-attentive. He may be feeling guilty about cheating, so he decides to shower you with attention and be the boyfriend you deserve to justify his actions and make it all OK in his mind.
- Different scent. If you hug him and notice he has a faint feminine scent, it’s not unreasonable to assume he was, at some point recently, in an embrace with a woman.
- Lack of interest. If your otherwise amorous boyfriend suddenly has no interest in being intimate with you, it could point to him being intimate with someone else.
- Social media friends. Another female acting flirty with your boyfriend on his social media pages or suddenly liking or commenting on all his photos can point to something going on.
Don’t Ignore the Clues
If your boyfriend displays one or more of these signs, don’t automatically assume he is cheating, but don’t completely ignore these signs either.
Tell him you’ve noticed some changes and ask if he is OK, then listen to what he says.
If you eventually reach a point where you are very suspicious he is cheating, then confront him about it.
Finally, sad as it may be, you are better off moving on to a new relationship than stay with someone who cheats.